May 24th: Another Bleeping National “Day”?


There’s a day for everything. I’m not just referring to, like, Taco Tuesday, but an actual nationally recognized, on-some-legit-calendars day.

Today, for example, is Brother’s Day.

Come on.

I’m not saying my brother doesn’t deserve a shout-out for his brotherly successes. I mean, there’s the time he dropped me on my 2-year-old face, subsequently jamming my tiny baby teeth right back up into my gums. And the time he convinced me that an indoor rollercoaster at Darien Lake wasn’t, in fact, a regular rollercoaster and that I could handle it, knowing full well that I wouldn’t learn the truth until I was inside and it was too late. And the time he ate my very last Bonker—in a time period when they were already hard to come by. (It was a grape one, if you weren’t already feeling sympathetic.)

Bonkers candy

But does he really deserve a whole day? I mean, for God’s sake, May 24th is already his birthday; now people are celebrating him nationally?

He does have some competition, though. The same day is also National Scavenger Hunt, Escargot, Aviation Maintenance Technician, and Emergency Medical Services for Children Day. I mean, who doesn’t love a scavenger hunt?

If you’re wondering about other recognized days, check out the National Day Calendar. You can also register a National Day yourself. Complete the application process and, if approved, your day will be broadcast in media alerts nationwide. It seems simple, but if it were, do you think days like National Make One of Those Folded Paper Things with the Numbers and Fortunes would get by?

Hey Cor, since Brother’s Day is basically a holiday, can I have the day off? Also, next Monday is National Paperclip Day, so I’ll expect that magnetic cup on my desk to be overflowing.

If not, see how you feel on October 16th when you don’t get recognized.

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